07/04/2026
🇺🇸 Happy 250th, America! Let’s Keep All Ten Fingers Tonight! 🇺🇸
Hey Charlies,
It is officially the Semi-Quincentennial (yeah, we had to look that word up)—the big 250th Anniversary of this great nation! 🎆
We want everyone to have an absolute blast celebrating two and a half centuries of freedom, but we also want to see you back at the shop next week with the exact same number of digits you have right now.
To ensure you don’t end up looking like the crew in our parking lot, please remember Cheap Charlie's Golden Rules for a safe Fourth:
Roman Candles are not lightsabers. Do not engage in parking lot duels.
Keep the fire in the sky, not on the sedan. Trunk-bed launches are highly discouraged.
The "Hold My B**r" rule: If any sentence starts with those words while holding a lighter, just don't.
Have fun, look out for each other, and come stock up on the coldest b**r and best w**e in town to toast to 250 years of liberty. Let's keep it safe so we can do it all again for the 251st!
Cheers