04/01/2026
🚨 PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT 🚨
To the elite athlete (DERRICK BURTON) who trained their whole life for the Olympic sport of “Pocketing Store Darts Without Paying” — congratulations, you nailed it. 🎯
Unfortunately, your accuracy in life choices is slightly worse than your aim.
Just a heads up: those darts you “borrowed” were worth less than your dignity… which is now officially on clearance.
Feel free to swing back in anytime — we’d love to see if you can hit the checkout next time instead of running from it.
Sincerely,
A store that sells darts… not giveaways 😅